Ten Commandments
[This post was written for a blogging contest in office. Now that the contest is over, I can post it in public. BTW... I am moving towards immunity against these experiances :-) So no complains any more]
SO yeah, I was lost in Bangalore, and that left me a lille Mathematically challenged and Linguistically disabled.
Even at the risk of repetition of the subject I can’t help but share my new found knowledge.
And boy! I am still learning. Feel free to add your lessons.
By now you would’ve guessed that this is yet another post on the Bangalore auto guys. For poor challenged souls like me, I believe we need a rule book; err… something like this –
1. What they say- 7 rupees a kilometer
What they mean- 7 rupees or MORE per kilometer
And you thought your math was weak!!
2. You stopped and asked directions to an Autoguy. Be ready to shell out 20 bucks.
C’mon, after all consulting business is booming these days.
3. 20 Rupees for 2 kilometer distance is actually 20 rupees EXTRA [Before signing the document please read the fine print carefully!!]
4. It’s never 15 Rupees, but 50! [Hearing disabilities, I say]
5. Please read the offer document carefully before signing. Auto rides longer than 7 km are subject to “Gas filling breaks” , “bidi halts” and “Detours at our masters’ whims and fancies”.
6. Implicit disclaimer by Auto Guys – “We are not responsible for the completion of your journey. The fare agreed at the beginning of the ride will be updated in transit, subject to traffic conditions, rains or any other mood swing”
7. In Bangalore you may suffer from common embarrassment symptoms and depression. Please contact fellow patients if you feel that you stay in a Godforsaken place, where no blessed soul [read, the guys queued up outside office] wants to take you!
8. The word “meter” is forbidden. Please ensure that you do not hurt the sentiments of our royals.
9. If you see a sign in your majesty’s chariot which says “ Please complaint to the police if the driver asks for extra fare”, it means that he will ask for only 20 rupees extra. “Ain’t I reasonable?”
10. And lastly – You don’t decide where you have to go, the Lord [ read auto guy] does!
And the learning continues…
14 comments:
Who gets to declare that an auto-wallah is a cheat?
The investment banking, consulting, sales&mktg janta ?
Cheat ? Auto-wallah ? What are you saying! :-)
Hilarious!!! with capital 'H' :-)))
now i know where are the vashi auto-wallahs hailing from ??
They definitely have their roots in bangalore :)
nice post :)
Thanx, Niki, Ram.
And Niki ... All the best :D
sure hope so...coz i do know you :D
O then help me please dipz. How do I know you?
Now its time for you to buy a car ;)
@mail2chawla
And miss all the daily fun !!!
As Satish said - never a dull day in B'lore, thanks to tehse guys :-)
Btw, do I know you ?
ys u know me. I used to read ur blogs often, just that I am using the new id now.
Havent been able to place you yet.
But keep visiting!
u have to visit chennai to love the blore auto-wallahs...
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